Chef's Delight (Stories of Serendipity) Page 10

  "Get out, Connor."

  "Jessie…I just want to take it a little slower…That's all."

  "No. I've had enough of this roller coaster with you for one day. Get out."

  He turned, and trudged out the door, regretting every step.

  Chapter 9

  Jessie spent the night in a bottle of whiskey. She sat in her bathtub, soaking her aching body and drinking the only booze she had, a bottle of rotgut whiskey she had been putting off drinking. She needed it tonight.

  Connor was making her crazy. After their wonderful morning together, making cheese, he had kissed her. And it had been amazing. Kissing Connor was riding in a jet. It took her breathe away, and made her want to shriek and laugh with intense pleasure. It made her stomach drop, then rise to her throat. Kissing Connor made her want to dance a happy dance. And then he’d put a stop to it, and walked out the door. Then, at the restaurant, he’d snapped at her, treating her like a plague. Then he’d come back to the house and saved her from Chad, stayed with her through the visit to the emergency room. He’d told her he liked her, wanted her, needed her. Then he wouldn't sleep with her. Shit. He was the rollercoaster. And she wanted off the ride.

  She didn’t know if she could do it. He said he wanted to, and then he acted like he wanted to. Then he would slam on the breaks again. She wasn’t sure how many times she could take the break slamming without finally flying through the windshield, only to lay broken and battered by the side of the road.

  Taking a slug of the whiskey straight from the bottle, Jessie sunk lower in the bubbles. At least Chad wasn’t coming back anytime soon. The judge wanted to make a deal with her, and Jessie pondered what he could do for her that would make it worth her while. She did see Connor's point, that if she didn't press charges, he would be free to do whatever to whoever the next time. One thing was for sure, though. He would never touch her again. Period.

  That was one less thing to worry about.

  And if she could just quit thinking about Connor, she could have another less thing to worry about.

  She took another drink from the bottle and reminded herself of how her heart had jumped when Connor told her he wanted her. He made it sound like he wanted a lifetime with her. And it had made her feel good.

  Sure, men had wanted her. And she had wanted them. But no man had ever wanted more than sex from her. Every time she tried to pursue something beyond sex, she had been rebuffed. Men wanted her. For sex, but nothing more.

  And apparently, Connor didn’t even want her for that.

  Jessie looked at the bottle of whiskey in her hand, and inevitably, her thoughts turned towards dear old dad.

  Living with Sonny Stillwell had been something she didn't usually dwell on, but with recent events, she couldn't keep from it. How the man managed to hold a job was beyond Jessie. She was pretty sure that he'd kept a bottle of vodka in his company truck, and stayed drunk most of the day. He was a supervisor on the grounds crew for the city of Serendipity, so he sat in his truck and "supervised" all day. When he came home, he'd sit in his chair and drink, feeling sorry for himself, until he passed out in his recliner, with the TV blaring to drown out his thoughts. Jessie had fended for herself most of her life.

  She took another slug of whiskey. Why wasn’t she drunk yet? She was tired of all of this thinking. When would the liquor take over and send her into a spinning stupor?

  Getting out of the bathtub, she pulled on her robe and carried the bottle back to the couch. She sat there, in her robe, clutching the whiskey, taking occasional drinks until the anticipated stupor finally took over.

  The next morning, Jessie woke to a pounding headache and a stiffness, which made her cry out when she stood. She had passed out on the couch, and at some point in the night, she’d actually laid down on it. Drawing herself another hot bath, she soaked some of the soreness out of her bones before making a whey smoothie. Having something in her stomach, and feeling her joints loosen up gave her just enough mobility to go out and milk the goats.

  Today, the goats were listening to Eurythmics. Jessie had the CD player set on a loop of Sweet Dreams are Made of These, which she listened to for the next two hours. After the first hour, she couldn’t stop the thoughts that kept creeping into her consciousness. Thoughts of yesterday. Chad. Judge Foster. Connor.

  She hurt, but she knew in her heart it wasn’t the physical pain that was bothering her. When she had seen herself in the mirror this morning, she had been surprised she didn’t look worse. Her face was swollen a little, but she only had the one black eye. The split in her lip wasn’t all that visible, and a little makeup would make it all go away. Her ribs didn’t look as bad as she expected either.

  Not having the visible bruising she’d been expecting made the pain less. Physically. Nothing could help her emotional pain.

  She had always just gone with her hormones. She didn’t know how to reign herself in. But apparently, that’s what Connor wanted. He wanted her to reign in her hormones, and not get physical with him. She had no idea what to make of that. She needed somebody else’s take on this.

  When she finished with the goats, she went inside and called Summer.

  “A Summer Place.”

  “Hey, Summer.”

  “Jessie! What’s up?” Her friend’s voice bubbled with enthusiasm.

  “I have a problem. With Connor.”

  “Uh Oh. What’s going on?”

  “I’m not even sure if you can help me. He doesn’t want to have sex with me. I don’t get it.” Jessie felt confused, and a little disheartened. She just didn’t understand what she had to do to get the guy in bed.

  “What?” Disbelief was evident in Summer’s voice.

  “Well, he seems like he does.” Her fingers fiddled with her hair, winding tendrils around her fingertips, a nervous habit that revealed she was unsure of herself. A rarity for Jessie.

  “Yeah, he does. The way he looks at you, girl…”

  “Yeah, well. He said he doesn’t.” Jessie said, matter-of-factly.

  Summer sighed, “Okay. What exactly did he say to you?” She sounded like she was talking to a kindergartener.

  “There’s something really intense between us, you know?” Jessie ran her hand over her face, trying to gather her thoughts.

  “Um. Yeah. That’s pretty obvious.”

  “Well, he keeps stopping us. He says he wants to start something, but as soon as we actually start to do something, he slams on the breaks. It’s really frustrating me. He says he wants to take things slow. I don’t know what that means.” Jessie finished with an exasperated sigh, blowing air out in a whooshing breath.

  “It means, he wants to take things slowly. He doesn’t want to just jump into bed with you. He wants to build up to it. To develop a relationship with you, first. That’s what it means.”

  “I’ve never done that. I’m not sure I know how.”

  “Just let him take the lead.”

  “I’ve been doing that, Summer. He’s the one who kissed me! I don’t know what this man wants!” Her hands waved around in exasperation.

  “Well, I can tell you. He wants you. He just doesn’t know how to go about it yet. Be patient with him. He’ll come around.” Summer sounded so confident, Jessie wished she could be as sure of herself.

  “You think so?”

  “Absolutely. You’d have to be in the grave to not feel the chemistry between the two of you. In fact, I’m not even sure that’s true. Have you been back over there?”

  “No.” Jessie lied.

  “Well, be careful if you do. Please.”

  “Just what, exactly are you afraid this ghost woman is going to do to me?”

  “I don’t know. But the fact she made herself visible to me indicates there’s a powerful energy at work in that house.”

  “Okay. Whatever. I’ll be careful. In fact, I may go over there for dinner.”

  “Good luck.” Summer said quietly.

  “Thanks. I’ll need it.”

  “I
wasn’t talking about Connor.” She warned.

  “Whatever, Summer.”

  When Jessie got to the restaurant that evening, she noticed there was only one car in the parking lot. Absently, she wondered what she could do to increase his business. Glancing at her watch, she realized it was later than she thought.

  Kathy was standing at the hostess stand, straightening the menus, getting ready to leave when Jessie entered.

  “Oh thank goodness. I really hope you can put him in a better mood. If I have to listen to that Nickelback song again, I’m going to murder someone.”

  Jessie giggled into the back of her hand. “Really? Nickelback?”

  Kathy rolled her eyes in response, and led Jessie to the table she had sat at before, next to the kitchen. “I was on my way out, I’ll talk to you later?” Kathy dipped a quick kiss on Jessie’s cheek before disappearing through the kitchen door.

  Less than a minute later, Connor appeared, standing at her table with a bottle of wine and two glasses. He deftly opened the bottle and poured them, not saying a word.

  Jessie began. “I’m sorry about yesterday.”

  “You don’t have anything to be sorry for. You had an awful day.” His cobalt blue eyes on her brought a warm flush to her cheeks, a feeling she was unaccustomed to.

  “I just don’t know how to do what you were asking.”

  “Take things slowly?”

  “Yes. I’ve never done that before.” She sighed, and tugged on a tendril of hair. “I’ve always just taken men home and had sex. I’ve never gotten to know any of them first.” She looked up at him. “The time I’ve spent with you is more time than I’ve spent with a man before sleeping with him. I guess I just didn’t see the point.” She took a sip of the wine, even though the thought of more alcohol turned her stomach. “But I’m willing to give it a shot. So. Here I am. Let’s get to know each other. Ask me questions. I’ll answer them truthfully.” She leaned back with her glass of wine on her stomach, tracing the rim with her fingers.

  Connor looked taken aback at her forwardness. Surprise twisted his features, before smoothing into amusement. “Okay. How many men have you taken home to have sex with?”

  Jessie thought a minute. “I’m not totally sure…in the last five years, probably between twenty and twenty-five.” She said candidly.

  Connor had just taken a sip of wine and when he heard her answer, he sputtered and choked. Between coughs, he rasped, “Twenty-five? Jesus!”

  “What? That’s one every few months. If I were a man, that would be considered…studly.” She finished weakly.

  “I’m just surprised, is all.” He said. “Your turn.”

  “Well, how many have you had?”

  “In the last five years?” He leaned back in his chair and steepled his fingers over his stomach.

  She nodded.

  “None.”

  Jessie couldn’t hide her shock. “What?!? Are you serious?”

  “Deadly.” His face was a mask, and Jessie couldn’t tell what he was thinking.

  “You haven’t had sex in five years?”

  He coughed slightly into his hand. “Eight years, actually.”

  “Well, I do feel slutty, now.”

  “Don’t. I’m an aberration.” He said wryly.

  “Well, now we know why we’re so bad at this stuff.” She laughed, trying to ease the tension. “Why haven’t you had sex in eight years?”

  “It’s my turn to ask the question.”

  “Okay. Ask.”

  He took a sip of wine, thoughtfully. “Do you want kids?”

  “Someday.”

  “Do you like kids?”

  “My turn. Why haven’t you had sex in eight years?”

  “It’s not important.”

  “Neither is how many guys I’ve slept with, but I answered you.”

  He shifted uncomfortably. “Fair enough. Um…My ex-wife pries into my sex life, and uses it against me. So I just quit having sex.”

  She looked at him. “Ex-wife?”

  “My turn.” He stroked his chin with an index finger. “What’s your favorite song to make love to?”

  “Wow.” She was shocked at his blatant question. Shocked he asked, not that she didn’t have one. “Just about any song by Nine Inch Nails, but I really like Down in It off of the Pretty Hate Machine album.”

  A corner of his mouth quirked up in an amused smirk. “Great album.” He shifted in his chair. “Your turn.”

  Jessie inhaled deeply, suddenly realizing she was more turned on than she had been in recent memory. “Okay, since this is the direction the questions are going…what’s your favorite position?”

  His eyes raked down her body, slowly. “I enjoy most of them. But I’ve been fantasizing about taking you from behind. And against the wall…”

  “Oh my…” Jessie’s words had left her. And her breath. She stared at him, watching his expression. She thought she could see desire in his eyes, but she had been mistaken about that before. “So, all this talk about sex…Have we gotten to know each other enough?”

  “I’ve been thinking today, about us.” He said quietly, his eyes watching her intensely. Sheesh, was he always this intense?

  “What have you been thinking?”

  “That I’m doing too much damn thinking.”

  “Oh yeah?” Jessie felt her insides pool, as they seemed to do a lot around Connor.

  “And now, we’re doing too much talking.” He stood, and walked over to Jessie. Standing in front of her, he looked down, holding out his hand. She looked up into his cerulean eyes, seeing a heat there that would melt glaciers. Swallowing past the lump in her throat, she slipped her hand into his.

  Connor yanked Jessie out of her chair and hauled her body against him. His mouth came crashing against hers in a searing kiss. Tongues entwining, at war with each other for dominance, their lips were sucking, hungrily. Breaking away from the kiss for air, Jessie’s breathing was ragged.

  “Connor.” She gasped.

  “Yeah…” His hands hadn’t stopped moving. They were caressing her back, while his mouth moved down her jaw, to the place where her neck and shoulders met.

  “What song have you been listening to?” She was curious, if it was the reason for this sudden change of heart.

  “S.E.X.” His mouth kept moving across her neck, as he spouted some of the lyrics into her heated skin.

  The lyrics themselves made something ache in Jessie’s groin, but hearing them in Connor’s husky, desire-laden voice was what tipped her over the edge. She groaned and leaned into him, slipping her hands under his coat, then his shirt to feel his skin.

  Connor started in on his buttons, shrugging off his coat, lips never leaving Jessie’s throat. He looked at her, as he pulled his tee shirt over his head, then their lips were on each other’s again, as he lifted her shirt over her breasts, hands fondling them through her bra.

  She pulled away to see what she’d been lusting after for these last few weeks. Connor stood there, looking at her with hooded eyes, his breaths making his chest heave. And what a chest it was. Chiseled, taut muscles, a light dusting of golden hair across the chest, and a sweet little trail traveling down, where his jeans hung low over his tapered hips. Jessie grabbed his hips and pulled him against her, feeling the erection that she had seen straining against his zipper. She tasted his chest, running sloppy kisses across from nipple to nipple, teasing and licking with her tongue.

  Connor groaned, as his hand went around to her rear, squeezing it before grasping it and picking her up to set Jessie on top of the table. He yanked her shirt over her head and unclasped her bra, letting her breasts fall loose into his hands. Then he stood back to look at her.

  Jessie could see desire in his eyes. They had darkened to an almost navy color, and his lids were heavy. She could hardly breathe with anticipation. She had fantasized about this man for so long, it seemed, and now, here he was. He was a perfect specimen of a man, and the way he looked at her right now made her to
es curl. He dropped to his knees and buried his face in her stomach, while his hands went to work on the button and zipper of her jeans. His mouth was making love to her navel, and she had never experienced the sensuality his tongue evoked, working its way around her belly button, before encircling it completely with his warm, wet, mouth. She felt the sensation in her toes.

  She gasped, as his mouth went lower. Jessie leaned back on one elbow to give him better access, while one hand stretched to his hair. He pulled her jeans to her ankles, and raised her legs over his head, so her knees were on his shoulders.

  Then Connor’s mouth took Jessie’s breath away.

  His tongue lightly flicked over her pearl of pleasure, as his hands kneaded the insides of her thighs, spreading them wider. Connor’s tongue flicked faster and harder, then he would stop and suck on the nub, sending Jessie into convulsions. She felt the heat travel through her body, as waves of pleasure rippled through her core. Bringing Jessie to the edge several times, he never led her completely over. Jessie was gasping with bliss, not wanting the sensations to end, yet feeling as if she couldn’t take any more of the torture he was inducing.

  “Connor…Please…”

  She could see his face rise up over the apex of her thighs, a satisfied smirk on his face. “What, Jessie?”

  “Please…Just do it.”

  “Do what?” His hands, which had been rubbing her thighs, slowly moved up higher. Finding her folds, one hand slipped a finger inside her, while the other hand teased the spot his tongue had tasted.

  Connor’s eyes were on Jessie the entire time.

  She couldn’t speak. As soon as his skilled fingers discovered her moistness, they went to work, and Jessie was incoherent.

  A sharp pain in Jessie’s arm managed to break through the haze of wantonness. When she looked at her bicep, she shrieked, sitting up rapidly on the table, causing Connor to fall to the floor.

  A shard of mirrored glass was embedded in Jessie’s arm, and blood oozed from the wound.